“It is as if my life were magically run by two electric currents: joyous positive and despairing negative--whichever is running at the moment dominates my life, floods it.” Sylvia Plath.
“They called me mad, and I called them mad, and damn them, they outvoted me.”
"Thinking is difficult, that's why most people judge." - Carl Gustav Jung
One particularly ridiculous subset of this, however, is the tendency to try to steer people away from mental illness (as though it were a choice) by telling them the ways in which they are making or will make themselves physically sick (as though it’s the only kind of sickness that really matters).
The implicit assumption these sentiments come from is that a person with a mental illness is hurting themselves for the sake of sustaining their mental illness, rather than the truth — which is that mental illnesses hurt people because they are illnesses. Illnesses are illnesses, not choices.
The physical aspects of my conditions are part and parcel of being sick, and I sometimes get particularly scared. Often I think we with mental illnesses already feel guilty enough, and we are not responsible for our own suffering. Beth Booth.
Persistent anxiety can be rooted from real (e.g. dog-bites) or unconscious fear even if there is no danger. When anxiety occurs, unconsciously, the mind keeps working without resting and defence mechanisms are automatically triggered (directly builds up hostility and aggressiveness behaviour). When you cannot flee or flight, one may just freeze, feel dizziness and have sleep issues. Empathy, understanding, acceptance, and unconditional positive regard are all necessary but not sufficient.
Some are “nice guys”, a term they hate. Innocent angel-like 'good as gold' persona which builds them a credible reputation yet they fail to reach their true potential due to their own self-doubt. Being “safe” and “secure” may be important. They’ll go out of their way to help others and may have a “knight in shining armour” complex and find themselves continually drawn to women who need rescuing.
Ultimately, since no one can actually “rescue” anyone else, the needy women will most likely use them and then dump them (and the cycle of feeling like a failure continues.) He fears them. He will choose a woman that has low or no self-esteem. He does this to preserve his fragile sense of importance.
But, either way, he will miss out on forming an intimate bond with his mate and live out his life in emotional isolation and deep loneliness. Zombified and gradually lose all interests in their hobbies and decide to do nothing with their lives. No matter what sacrifice you make or how many times you turn yourself inside out and relinquish the sanctity of your life, you cannot change a people who drain you. What you can do is begin to recognize your own value as an individual, to heal and move forward to lead the life that you deserve----filled with insight, creativity, compassion, joy and inner peace.
This piece is a helping hand, my and other ppl's collection, to help oneself after that nervous breakdown. I, having been one member of this group, want to share my findings (solutions that I found on my own). I think, I understand the challenges face by abusers/bullies & helpless victims; people who growing up desperately wanted to be normal; people with learning problems such as memorize facts, dropping words, spellings & grammar difficulties, maths and sports; organizational difficulties; people who are awkward and have dysfunctional behaviour etc...
- Honouring and allow people the space to find their own way (suppressing it only makes matters worse)
- Keeping up your personal growth work (have the courage to become the person you've always wanted to be)
- Identify where you are not being truthful in your life (No 'Little White Lies' & Make a distinction between the problem and the person)
- Understand and smile at the failure. Being grateful.
- Get the Real Power Back and Fly more Positively than ever before.
The main cause of memory loss is a hormone known as cortisol. It's the hormone released during stress, which is why those with severe anxiety (and ultimately severe stress) are more at risk for developing memory loss problems. The longer you deal with anxiety, the more cortisol you'll have in your system, and that means that you're more likely to continue to suffer from memory loss in the future. But cortisol is not the only culprit, there is sleep loss and social reasons etc. Memory loss may be its own cause of anxiety. Some signs are : You may also notice that normal tasks seem hard to focus on, you are more forgetful, you forget things that you normally wouldn't, or you have difficulty forming thoughts or carrying on conversations.
As we age, our bodies change. These changes impact the length and quality of our sleep. As we age, our bodies secrete less of two important sleep hormones: melatonin and growth hormone. Without good sleep, brain functions 40% less at work and increases depression, anxiety and obesity. You are also unfocused and forgetful. You not only lose control over your mood but also the ability to pay attention, solve problems and be creative. It becomes dangerous for everyone on the road since it gets hard to remain alert and responsive (especially, like me, if you have to ride a bike to get to work). Its as dangerous as driving while drunk beyond the legal limit. If you had 4 or 5 hours of sleep, then you need 2 weeks of good sleep to recover.
Depression removes us from comfort zone and entangled us in the cobweb of lonesome world. Escape puts us in a comfort zone only temporarily. This time my mind did not let go of depression, my anxiety got worse and I was overwhelmed with stress. When you cannot flee or flight, one may just freeze, feel dizziness and have sleep issues. It turns out my subconscious mind was forcing me to face my repressed trauma. My mind and body stopped responding and I failed to do even the most basic things. I spend hours lying on the floor.
When you are surviving your life, each small step that seems to come so easily to most human beings feel like the hardest task you have ever had to do. At every step there are multiple thoughts of why I should just retreat back to isolation where I feel safest and forget about making any attempts. Everything is no joy, no ease and no hope. Heaviness on my heart, heaviness in my head, a black and dark sadness in my eyes and soul. The self-hate, the doom, the hopelessness feels all too familiar, and that is not a good thing because it makes me realize my quality of life is really not that great.
Many of our current issues, have its roots hidden in our early childhood. One way to resolve deep resentments, bubbling under the surface, since the time you are 4 years to 7 years old, is to by going through this process. You have to close your eyes and imagine that your child self was on the other side of an imaginary door. Then you have open the door and walk to meet your child self. Then you have to try to talk to your child self with love. First time I tried, I failed to talk to my child self. Then I came back home and slept on it. I then started thinking why this simple task was so difficult for me.
Children who are compared with other children because they didn't get good marks in school sometimes grow up feeling that they are “fooling people” and express fear that they’ll be “found out” when they enjoy success in the world. The maternal voice in their head will continue to undermine them, telling them that they aren't — smart, beautiful, kind, loving, worthy.
Children who live in houses, where they see parents verbally abusing each other because of money feel scared and need reassurance. Children who were made to feel unlovable can carry that pain throughout their lives, and into every relationship. They are armored and detached, perhaps defensively or they become “pleasers” in adult relationships, not being able to say ‘no’ wanting a relationship so intense that the other person backs off. Alas, both types aren’t able to get the kind of emotional connection. They are afraid of intimacy on all levels; they are intensely vulnerable, and tend to be clingy and dependent. They oversensitive (about things real and imagined), overthinking everything and make avoidance the default position.
I realised I had not thought about my childhood days for a long time. Now I was forced to go back to remember how much I hated those days as a child. So, next time when I tried I was able to connect and talk to my child self in a sincere and friendly way; and that pain and anger was still inside me. After that my head felt lighter and I was able to do regular things again. I understood her therapy was working. She explained why my depression and anxiety come to the surface and I can learn to overcome it by giving attention to root cause. I had a choice of either not learning and repeating this pattern, which will only get worse or I can slowly overcome it in time if you understand and learn to keep myself healthy.
I have to now practice how to be child-like open and curious so that I can progress in personal and professional life, but also when to not get affected by negativity by being a good protective parent. To do that I have to regularly built certain habits in order to strengthen my self-esteem. Many years I have given too much power to my protective conscious mind, which has become too loud. I have to encourage to increase my subconscious inner voice and listen to what my subconscious inner voice is saying.
Melatonin is important because changes in the level of this hormone control our sleep cycle. With less melatonin, many older adults feel sleepy in the early evening and wake up in the early morning. They also may have more trouble falling asleep. Growth hormone is what makes children sleep so deeply. As we age, our body secretes less of this hormone and deep sleep becomes more difficult.
Your perspective on life comes from the cage you were held captive in. I didn't invent my severe anxiety illness like people don't invent their bad health. Many suffer from constant fatigue that is not relieved by rest and sleep. Bit no one really cares one way or another, unless you ruin the morning announcements with a suicide.
We know so little about consciousness and will probably never fully understand it. Because psyche constitutes our identity, a problem with it seems to strike at the very core of what we think we are.
Some signs are : You may also notice that normal tasks seem hard to focus on, you are more forgetful, you forget things that you normally wouldn't, or you have difficulty forming thoughts or carrying on conversations.
- You have everything you need to get better. This sounds well intentioned, but to me it sounded like an indictment against me for not trying hard enough. It’s no doubt hard to watch someone who’s smart and capable unable to work. But telling a person who’s already struggling that they're lazy, just making excuses or aren't trying hard enough can be incredibly hurtful. It implied that I was staying sick on purpose, and that I had no interest in pursuing health, not to mention that I was too lazy or disinterested to do what I needed to do to get better.
- Just pray, because saying they lack sufficient faith adds insult to injury.
- Snap out of it. Everyone experiences a range of emotions. For instance, everyone feels sad occasionally. But sadness on some days isn't the same as “a hopeless pit of despair where it’s so dark I’ve forgotten what light looks like”
- Stop focusing on the bad stuff, and just start living. Why is this so problematic? It can make a person feel even worse about themselves. “[T]hey figure the fact that they can’t do it is, in their mind, just one more sign of their failure.”
- While a change in perspective can be helpful, it doesn't cure a condition, let alone someone debilitated by an exhausting mental illness.
- Get busy, and distract yourself. Because ignoring the issue doesn't make it go away.
- Emotionally connect while eating together
- Do not compare him with others
- Don't have parental conflict in front of your children
- Its mother's job, to tell him to trust his good traits because there are enough people in the world who will tell him what is wrong with him.
- It is very important to teach your sensitive son about how to handle his emotions
How Self-Esteem is Damaged: Some parents inadvertently diminish their children’s self-esteem by interfering with or belittling their signals for interest and enjoyment. This triggers the automatic, built-in response of shame, and shame erodes self-esteem.
Often its both the parents and children have a variety of troubles related to a poor sense of self and self-esteem. The adults in these families often don’t understand how feelings and emotions work. The family ends up in a toxic situation because there is a mismatch between the child’s expression of emotional needs and the parent’s ability to respond appropriately. Often, then, the children fail to develop a solid sense of self—who they are, what they like and don’t like, a confidence in their perceptions and feelings, and so on. The resulting tension that develops between parent and child can contribute to the erosion of his self-esteem. The child may become angry, defensive, intolerant, and inflexible, or withdrawn, self-destructive, envious, and fearful. In fact, a whole variety of the less pleasing personality traits can be directly attributed to a person’s lack of belief in his own essential worth. Think bully. Think timid. Think depressed, depleted, and drained. These different qualities result, in part, from a lack of self-esteem.
When a baby cries, or fusses, or coos, she expects you to react with as much enthusiasm or distress as she does about what is happening to her. What parents sometimes forget is that to babies those reactions of distress are proportional to the situation. Not being able to get a hold of a ball that rolled into a corner is terrible! And your baby wants you to pay attention to him when he announces it in no uncertain terms. He finds himself incapable of righting the situation himself—no matter what he does, he’ll never be able to reach the ball. Talk about frustration! So he asks for your help in the only way he can—by making a scene. If that doesn’t elicit your sympathy and attention, if you don’t respond and help your baby out of his distress, he will begin to think that his problems don’t really matter, how he feels doesn’t count. Instead, if you take the opportunity to pay attention, validating and confirming his feelings and perceptions, you will help your child become confident.
Provide Reward and Praise: Along with paying attention, reward and praise from you are essential to child’s self-esteem. You must never forget how much your child wants to be like you and to be liked by you. Kids need to hear that you approve of them and think they are wonderful. They long to see the “gleam in your eye” that signals love and approval. You can’t assume they know how you feel. They don’t. They need to be told, over and over and over. In the long run, reward and praise tend to be better and healthier motivators than fear and shame. Of course, whenever you’re dealing with behavior, it is also important to explain to the child the pros and cons, the reasons and rationales, for whatever issue is at stake.
Offer Protection: If a child perceives the world as threatening or dangerous, it is almost impossible for her to feel brave and strong, to know that she can make her way through it successfully. But when you respond to your child’s negative signals of distress and anger by allowing expression of the signals and then removing the triggers, you have begun to give her the tools to deal with the world. When it comes to feeling confident, nothing helps a helpless baby like knowing she can depend on you to shield her from danger and distress.
Go for a mood disorders/borderline personality/bipolar disorder (what kind?) checkup. Many children who actually have this condition have been incorrectly diagnosed with ADHD because the official guidelines for diagnosing bipolar disorder outline criteria based on classic adult symptoms. Bipolar I Disorder is a life-long disease and runs in families. About half of all patients with Bipolar I Disorder have one parent who also has a mood disorder, usually Major Depressive Disorder.
(Acceptance of the illness is the first and major hurdle in treatment. People who have not experienced quality psychotherapy tend to think of it as a sort of "pep talk" providing motivation without substance, or perhaps a mystical or metaphysical sort of process. These are mistaken impressions, however. Receiving effective bipolar treatment psychotherapy is about being instructed or coached in methods of effective coping with bipolar symptoms in a non-judgmental environment. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, the dominant psychotherapy bipolar treatment available today, is based on the premise that many (but certainly not all) mood problems are based less on physical brain problems, and more on habitually dysfunctional ways that people learn to appraise and interpret stressful events occurring in their lives.
The types can be mild level to moderate level to high level to specific illness due to extreme level: Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal, Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissistic, Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-Compulsive.
Treatments: (1) psychoeducation, (2) cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), (3) family focused therapy (FFT), and (4) interpersonal and social rhythm therapy (IPSRT). Some people emerge from their experiences with bipolar disorder with deep questions about who they are and what has happened to their lives. What choices were "real," and which were influenced by mania or depression? When mood swings stabilize and life is more predictable from one day to the next, some patients struggle with issues of identity.)
Learning disabilities are caused by neurological impairments not character flaws. People growing up with a learning disability often feel a sense of shame. These individuals were frequently written off as being unable to learn, and most passed through the school system without acquiring basic academic skills. Rather than risk being labelled as stupid or accused of being lazy, some adults deny their learning disability as a defence mechanism. Internalized negative labels of stupidity and incompetence usually result in a poor self concept and lack of self confidence. All learning disabilities are not the same or Dyslexia.
The truth is with proper recognition, intervention and lots of hard work, children and adults with learning disabilities can learn and succeed!
The same disabilities that interfere with reading, writing, and arithmetic also will interfere with sports and other activities, family life, and getting along with friends. Some terms related to learning disabilities:
- Dyslexia, a reading disability
- Dyscalculia, a math disability
- Dysgraphia, a writing disability
"He has the ability, if he just tried harder, he could do it. He chooses not to do the work."
"If she would just pay attention, she would get it."
"After I give the instructions, he sits there and stares at his paper. He is not motivated."
Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) is the most commonly diagnosed behavioural disorder of childhood. It is diagnosed much more often in boys than in girls. Most children with ADHD also have at least one other developmental or behavioural problem. Learning disabilities are lifelong conditions. they aren't contagious, but they can be genetic. Someone with a learning disability probably has other family members who have had some learning troubles, too.
Too often, difficult children are incorrectly labelled with ADHD. On the other hand, many children who do have ADHD remain undiagnosed. Reading, doing math, and writing letters may be tough for lots of kids at first. But when those early troubles don't fade away, and it's really difficult to make any progress, it's possible the kid has a learning disability. As with students' reading disabilities, when math difficulties are present, they range from mild to severe.
A child with a math–based learning disorder may struggle with memorization and organization of numbers, operation signs, and number “facts”, concepts, rules, formulas, sequences, and procedures, have difficulty keeping score in a game. Children with math learning disorders might also have trouble with counting principles or have difficulty telling time. Difficulty in memorizing number facts, arithmetic weakness or severe lack of math talent, not understanding the math language, lack of spatial ability to understand math, problems in understanding content from reference books and study material are some of the math-based learning disabilities.
Language ignorance is the biggest barrier in learning Math. One should be able to interpret the language in the question correctly before deciding the action to solve it. Learning disabilities in writing can involve the physical act of writing or the mental activity of comprehending and synthesizing information. Basic writing disorder refers to physical difficulty forming words and letters. Expressive writing disability indicates a struggle to organize thoughts on paper. If either the eyes or the ears aren’t working properly, learning can suffer and there is a greater likelihood of a learning disability or disorder. People with an attention deficit or concentration disorder cannot tune out distractions that others may barely notice.
A child with a learning disability cannot try harder, pay closer attention, or improve motivation on their own; they need help to learn how to do those things. A learning disability, or learning disorder, is not a problem with intelligence. Learning disorders are caused by a difference in the brain that affects how information is received, processed, or communicated. Children and adults with learning disabilities have trouble processing sensory information because they see, hear, and understand things differently. under the right learning conditions, the brain has the ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections. Those new connections facilitate skills like reading and writing that had been difficult using the old connections.
Many teenagers have struggled for years with a learning disability, oftentimes without parents or teachers recognizing the issue. Without proper intervention, these teens often end up frustrated and work far below their abilities. This leads to a loss of self-esteem and self-confidence. Adolescents with learning disabilities learn best when their class work is structured for them on an individual basis. Unfortunately, when learning disabilities go unrecognized, teachers and parents often label these students as "lazy" or "incapable," and the teen will often meet these low expectations in response.
Teens with learning disabilities are often bright, creative, and capable, but have neurological issues that impact performance in certain areas, such as reading, math, or social skills. The child might perform exceptionally well in one area, but underachieve in another. These disparities in performance often frustrate and confuse parents and teachers. They cannot understand how a child so capable in one area of his or her life has so much difficulty in another area. If teachers and parents do not properly identify the learning disability, such adolescents can "fall through the cracks" of the traditional education system.
Everyone faces obstacles and the most important thing you can show your child, apart from your consistent love and support, is how to deal with obstacles. A good attitude won’t solve the problem, but it can give your child hope and confidence that things can improve. For all children, but especially those with learning disabilities, social and emotional skills are the most consistent indicators of success, outweighing everything else, including academic factors.
When you discover that your child has a learning disability, it can be shocking and intimidating. All children can be both exhilarating and exhausting, but it may seem that your child with a learning disability is especially so. You may experience some frustration trying to work with your child, and it can seem like an uphill battle when you don’t have the information you need. It's important to gain and keep a clear perspective.
Academic challenges may lead to low self–esteem, withdrawal and behaviour problems, but you can counter these things by creating a strong support system for your child and helping them learn to express themselves, deal with frustration and work through challenges. the child just learns differently than others. The trick will be figuring out how your child learns best and identify what the child's strengths are — what he is good at!
Set specific, appropriate target goals to guide therapy, Systematic follow-up is important to regularly reassess target goals results and behaviour therapy should be started.
One common approach recommended by many experts in the field is the CSA sequence: from concrete, to semi concrete, to abstract. The use of manipulative is also encouraged. If tutoring can take place in a private room, he can learn without interruption and without the stigma of feeling that she is being judged. often, kids with learning disabilities can continue in their regular classrooms and there's no reason they can't do normal stuff, like participate in school activities and sports. If he can learn to use drawing to express math, he may grasp concepts more easily. Exercises that include memory aids and thinking strategies might also be useful. his progress will be slow but steady, and his fear of math should gradually diminish. he needs to work with manipulative so he can use his tactile senses rather than depending upon reading, by breaking down problems into step-by-step sequences. he might pair a volunteer tutor and use math videotapes and drill and practice activities.
then there is the Math Program which is not recommended for reading and/or spelling difficulties. the step to master maths skills must be done in a sequential fashion. in case of math, a child first has to learn the foundational skills of math, like visual perception, visual memory, and logical thinking. One has to learn to count before it becomes possible to learn to add and subtract. Suppose one tried to teach a child, who had not yet learned to count, to add and subtract. This would be quite impossible and no amount of effort would ever succeed in teaching the child these skills.
Some learning disabled students have an excellent grasp of math concepts, but are inconsistent in calculating. They are reliably unreliable at paying attention to the operational sign, at borrowing or carrying appropriately, and at sequencing the steps in complex operations. These same students also may experience difficulty mastering basic number facts. Interestingly, some of the students with these difficulties may be remedial math students during the elementary years when computational accuracy is heavily stressed, but can go on to join honours classes in higher math where their conceptual prowess is called for.
Students with writing disorders are often encouraged to keep a journal—a daily record of their activities. They often find it easier to express their thoughts by using a computer rather than paper and pencil. Children with mathematical disorders are often given number problems from everyday life. For example, they are taught how to balance a check book or compare prices on a shopping trip.
A solution example, in detail: Take brushing your teeth- break it down into small steps and think of one thing at a time.
- Getting organized- means getting where you need to be and gathering your supplies. To brush your teeth, go to the bathroom, get out your toothbrush and toothpaste, get your toothbrush wet, then put toothpaste on it.
- Staying focused- means sticking with the task. Dentists say to brush for 3 minutes, so that means keep brushing, even if you hear a really good song on the radio or you remember that you wanted to call your friend. Concentrate and remember what the dentist told you about brushing away from your gums.
- Getting it done!- If you do steps 1 and 2, step 3 almost takes care of itself. Hurray, your 3 minutes are up and your teeth are clean! Getting it done means finishing up and putting on the finishing touches. With teeth brushing, that would be stuff like rinsing off your toothbrush and putting it away, putting the cap back on the toothpaste, and making sure there's no toothpaste foam on your face!
Healthy persons normally use different defences throughout life. An ego defence mechanism becomes pathological only when its persistent use leads to maladaptive behaviour such that the physical and/or mental health of the individual is adversely affected. The purpose of the Ego Defence Mechanisms is to protect the mind/self/ego from anxiety, social sanctions or to provide a refuge from a situation with which one cannot currently cope. Borderline personality organization develops when the child cannot integrate positive and negative mental objects together.
In the ego, there are two ongoing processes. First, there is the conscious secondary process, where strong boundaries are set and thoughts must be organized in a coherent way. By contrast, there is the unconscious primary process, where the thoughts are not organized in a coherent way, the feelings can shift, contradictions are not in conflict or are just not perceived that way, and condensations arise. There is no logic and no time line. Lust is important for this process.
- Psychotic defences (i.e. psychotic denial, Distortion, delusional projection)
- Immature defences (i.e. fantasy, projection, Somatisation, passive aggression, acting out, Idealization)
- Neurotic defences (i.e. Isolation, intellectualization, reaction formation, dissociation, displacement, repression, Regression, Rationalization)
- Mature defences (i.e. humour, sublimation, suppression, altruism, anticipation, Identification, Introjections)
Denial: Refusal to accept external reality because it is too threatening; arguing against an anxiety-provoking stimulus by stating it doesn't exist; resolution of emotional conflict and reduction of anxiety by refusing to perceive or consciously acknowledge the more unpleasant aspects of external reality.
Distortion: A gross reshaping of external reality to meet internal needs.
Delusional Projection: Grossly frank delusions about external reality, usually of a persecutory nature.
Fantasy: Tendency to retreat into fantasy in order to resolve inner and outer conflicts.
Projection: Projection is a primitive form of paranoia. Projection also reduces anxiety by allowing the expression of the undesirable impulses or desires without becoming consciously aware of them; attributing one's own unacknowledged unacceptable/unwanted thoughts and emotions to another; includes severe prejudice, severe jealousy, hyper vigilance to external danger, and "injustice collecting". It is shifting one's unacceptable thoughts, feelings and impulses within oneself onto someone else, such that those same thoughts, feelings, beliefs and motivations are perceived as being possessed by the other.
Somatisation: The transformation of negative feelings towards others into negative feelings toward self, pain, illness, and anxiety.
Passive aggression: Aggression towards others expressed indirectly or passively.
Acting out: Direct expression of an unconscious wish or impulse in action, without conscious awareness of the emotion that drives that expressive behavior.
Idealization: Unconsciously choosing to perceive another individual as having more positive qualities than he or she may actually have.
Displacement: Defence mechanism that shifts sexual or aggressive impulses to a more acceptable or less threatening target; redirecting emotion to a safer outlet; separation of emotion from its real object and redirection of the intense emotion toward someone or something that is less offensive or threatening in order to avoid dealing directly with what is frightening or threatening. For example, a mother may yell at her child because she is angry with her husband.
Dissociation: Temporary drastic modification of one's personal identity or character to avoid emotional distress; separation or postponement of a feeling that normally would accompany a situation or thought.
Isolation: Separation of feelings from ideas and events, for example, describing a murder with graphic details with no emotional response.
Intellectualization: A form of isolation; concentrating on the intellectual components of a situation so as to distance oneself from the associated anxiety-provoking emotions; separation of emotion from ideas; thinking about wishes in formal, affectively bland terms and not acting on them; avoiding unacceptable emotions by focusing on the intellectual aspects (e.g. Isolation, Rationalization, Ritual, Undoing, Compensation, Magical thinking).
Reaction Formation: Converting unconscious wishes or impulses that are perceived to be dangerous into their opposites; behaviour that is completely the opposite of what one really wants or feels; taking the opposite belief because the true belief causes anxiety. This defence can work effectively for coping in the short term, but will eventually break down.
Repression: Process of pulling thoughts into the unconscious and preventing painful or dangerous thoughts from entering consciousness; seemingly unexplainable naivety, memory lapse or lack of awareness of one's own situation and condition; the emotion is conscious, but the idea behind it is absent.
Regression: Temporary reversion of the ego to an earlier stage of development rather than handling unacceptable impulses in a more adult way.
Rationalization: Where a person convinces him or herself that no wrong was done and that all is or was all right through faulty and false reasoning. An indicator of this defence mechanism can be seen socially as the formulation of convenient excuses.
Altruism: Constructive service to others that brings pleasure and personal satisfaction
Anticipation: Realistic planning for future discomfort
Humour: Overt expression of ideas and feelings (especially those that are unpleasant to focus on or too terrible to talk about) that gives pleasure to others. Humour, which explores the absurdity inherent in any event, enables someone to "call a spade a spade", while "wit" is a form of displacement (see above under Category 3). Wit refers to the serious or distressing in a humorous way, rather than disarming it; the thoughts remain distressing, but they are "skirted round" by witticism.
Identification: The unconscious modelling of one's self upon another person's character and behaviour.
Introjections: Identifying with some idea or object so deeply that it becomes a part of that person.
Sublimation: Transformation of negative emotions or instincts into positive actions, behaviour, or emotion.
Suppression: The conscious process of pushing thoughts into the preconscious; the conscious decision to delay paying attention to an emotion or need in order to cope with the present reality; making it possible to later access uncomfortable or distressing emotions while accepting them.}